You know those romantic comedies where the broken-hearted main character realizes, right at the end of the movie, that their true love has been their best friend all along. Sounds cute, right? But is it realistic? Eh, that depends. In theory, falling in love with your best friend sounds like the ideal situation. You are best friends already, which means you get along with one another. While this is true and great, it also means that you have a very special friendship in your hands. Falling in love with that person puts your friendship at risk, and there’s no guarantee that it’ll turn out like the fairy tale rom-com. And I know you probably want to confess to them. So, before you make any big moves, here are 6 steps you could possibly do when you fall in love with your best friend.
1. Write a pros and cons list.
For this first step, you’ll want to list the benefits and disadvantages of dating your best friend. This will let you truly separate your platonic feelings from your romantic ones. What positive qualities does your best friend have that would be helpful in a relationship? Now, on the flip side, you also know your best friend’s worst aspects. So, under cons, what would be the downers or negative things they would bring to the table as a boyfriend or girlfriend? Nobody’s perfect, so don’t sugarcoat this list. And don’t just use examples of when you two are hanging as homies. Context changes meaning, and environments change reactions. Just because someone is a fun friend, doesn’t mean they would be a fun romantic partner, you know.
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2. Talk it out with a mutual friend.
Someone who knows the both of you would be able to see the situation a bit more clearly than you can… you know since you’re hiding behind your in-love, rose-colored glasses. Tell this mutual friend how you’re feeling, but make sure they keep your secret to themselves. Once they share their thoughts, actually consider what they say. They might have a better idea of the two of you. But do be careful of one of those mutual friends who also like your best friend. They can surely try to sabotage a relationship too. I’ve seen it happen. That is the friend you don’t want to listen to. Probably a good idea to do this when you fall in love with your best friend.
3. Consider their current status.
Before you start daydreaming about riding off into the sunset with your BFF, you’ve got to know – are they interested in dating right now? Are they even single? Maybe they’re already into someone else. Or, maybe they don’t want to get into a relationship right now because they are too busy. Evaluate what you know about their current romantic status, and keep it in mind. Friends don’t pressure each other to change their boundaries, so no matter where your friend is at, you’ve got to respect their current status. But if you have a good feeling about their current status, and it’s positive, it’s time to move onto the next step.
4. Weigh your options.
When you are in love with your best friend, there are really only three possible outcomes. You both either date, stay friends or never speak to each other again. Rough extremes, aren’t they? Hey, I didn’t make the rules. The biggest question to ask yourself is: Is it worth potentially losing your best friend over this? If you think YES, you absolutely can’t hide your feelings any longer and they’ll never go away, then you have to tell them how you feel. If you say, NO, then you probably aren’t watching this video. And for those who are going to answer with a “Maybe,” which is like 99% of you, then I would say just go for it. You’re already on the fence, I’m just giving you a little push. And if you tell me you did it, I’ll even heart your comment.
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5. Ask them on a date and see how they react.
If you’ve gotten through the other points and still feel confident about trying to take the next step with your best friend, you have reached the bold #5. Ask your friend to hang out somewhere that is more romantic than your usual spots. If you want to be even blunter, say “It’s a date!” at the end of your conversation. Tell them to dress up, or not, whatever floats your boat. If they are still oblivious, amp up your flirting until they are 100% clear on what you mean. Then, you need to be a Private Eye and really gauge their reaction. Do they seem excited about the idea? Confused? Maybe they are totally weirded out. Their reaction will probably coincide with how they feel about you romantically, so pay close attention.
6. Tell them.
If you received a positive response from them in step 5. Or that is if you’ve gone through the last five steps, thought it through, and decided with all your heart that you must share your feelings with your best friend, now is the time. You can do this in whichever way feels right, but I always recommend a face-to-face confession if you’re up for it. This will allow you to be as real and honest as it can be, and it doesn’t leave you waiting hours on your phone for a response. Be straight-up about how you’re feeling and ask your best friend for their honest reply. And who knows where this could go! Maybe have a generation of mini you running around. You should definitely do it if you fall in love with your best friend.
Related: How to confess to your crush
Conclusion:
Overall, falling in love with your best friend can be a pretty confusing scenario. It takes a lot of thought to decide on your next step. Whatever you decide to do, or not do, remember that you have a very special person in your life. I mean, they’re not only your best friend, but they’re also a potential romance in your eyes, too! You’re lucky to have found such a person, so make sure not to take them for granted. So there you have it 6 things on what to do when you fall in love with your best friend.